Avoid hanging your favorite posters up in your dorm with poster mounts. Some brands of poster mounts are far stickier than they need to be, and the effects could be disastrous to your posters, wall, sanity, or even your emotional health. There is a good chance that you will end up lamenting the fairly significant tear in your Avengers poster. There is an even better chance that you will end up taking a ten minute bus ride to the store so you can buy some sponges strong enough to scrub off the sticky half-remains of the poster mounts you thought you were so smart to use.
And there is a slight chance that on the bus ride, you will eventually end up sitting across the aisle from a man who has scrunched himself down to a length short enough that he can lie down across the two chairs in his row. He might eventually sit up and pull a small, inexpensive, stick-shaped mp3 player out of his pocket and play with it as he listens to whatever it is that he listens to through his black earbuds.
And as he turns the mp3 player over and over in his hands, he may start looking around. He may glare at the window, and at the other passengers on the bus. He might even turn around and glare at you for a moment before glaring at his mp3 player with obvious frustration. There is a small, but not impossible chance that he will bitterly tear the back of the mp3 player away and yank the ear buds out of his ears with one blunt pull of the cord. And then he would, perhaps, abruptly drop the whole broken, tangled mess on the floor with obvious loathing and disapproval.
And then you would probably start looking out the window and trying to mentally prepare yourself for your 7:30 final the next morning. Or you would possibly pull out your phone and answer a text you had forgotten to reply to. Or maybe you would take out your book and start reading.
Except the man might pull out a small paper copy of the bus schedule and start aggressively turning it over in his hands. And, if you’re lucky, the paper will not be made out of the thin paper used in receipt machines. If you’re lucky, the sound will not be small, inconsequential, and yet the only audible thing in the entire bus. If you’re lucky, the tiny, incessant sound of paper on paper will not make you want to start singing to drown out the sound, or you won’t want to groan, or tear your hair out, or at least get off at the next stop even if it means you have to walk a long ways.
But if you are not that lucky, then at least you do not have long to wait before your stop. And you will go to the store and buy your extra-strength sponges and maybe also a bottle of water or a granola bar. And when you get back to your dorm, you might learn that your sponge, that should have lasted at least a month for any hardcore germaphobe, leaves you only with a torn up sponge with a number of holes worn through it after five minutes of scrubbing.
And as you stand in your empty half of the room with an RA from one dorm over, you might just nervously play with the ring you always wear, or possibly with a bracelet you’re wearing, or maybe even with a receipt you found in your pocket. And she may look at you with annoyance, but that might only intensify your nervous fidgeting as you point out the places left with sticky residue and chunks of missing paint.
All I’m saying is that if you learn anything before going to college, it’s that poster mounts are more trouble than they’re worth.
I just ended an essay with “The only thing that can be determined in the conclusion of this study is that, while all types of walking are equal, some types of walking are more equal than others.”
I imagine that I will either be given bonus points for making a brilliant reference to “Animal Farm” or lose points for brilliantly (and unashamedly) ripping off “Animal Farm.”
(There is, of course, a third possibility where I am given a poor grade because this is a horribly written essay which only manages to halfway answer the prompt in its ceaseless ambiguity.)
Nevermind. There appears to be a previously unexpected third option in which the teacher gives me 100% and doesn’t even mention the sentence that I was so excited about including in my essay conclusion.